I'm leaving this thread open for discussion on how SPD affects one's emotional life. See my first post on this thread for an example.
Having SPD makes me feel bad about myself. I know in my head that I'm not less, but it can be hard not to feel like I'm less. When I see people holding hands, wrapping their arms around each other, hugging, etc., I get this awful feeling in my heart. I think that feeling is called longing. I want what they have. I don't want touch to hurt.
When my senses are "off," I feel like a scared child and even more introverted than I normally am. SPD makes me feel different from everyone else and alone. I feel ashamed and guilty and like an outcast. I see other people touch metal with no problem, and I hate that it is so easy for them. My two biggest pains right now are touching people and touching metal. I might post more later, but I think that's enough for now.
(((hugs))) Sorry I don't have any advice I couldn't read without replying though. I know you are not alone in feeling that way. It's not me but my daughter that has SPD and with hers she gets very very anxious and can't participate in things like she would want to. She's very extroverted and I know it's hard for her not to be part of big groups because she can't handle the noise and movement.
Thank you for your caring and encouraging reply.
My sensory problems don't make me feel as isolated as my food allergies do. I HATE it when people casually talk about food and trying new things. For me it is such a nightmare to try new foods, because it is so dangerous. I love the taste of many of the foods I am allergic to, so even if I "detect" that a food I am eating isn't safe, I might not stop myself because my body misses the flavor. Then I end up sick for a few days because I "dared" to eat something unsafe.
People do treat me like a freak because my food allergies make scrapbooking, licking/touching stamps, using bandaids, and many other common things impossible without injuring myself.
Sometimes I don't know where the line between my SPD and Food Allergies is, but where they blur is definitely some of my most isolating problems. For example, I will have an allergic reaction if I inhale nuts being eaten by someone else within 10 feet of me. This distance keeps growing, they used to have to be next to me even 2 years ago. Prior to that I only reacted to nuts if I was the one who ate them. I fear it will get as bad as my Popcorn allergy which I react to inhalling it made even several hours prior, through doors, and over 200 feet away. I can not walk near a Movie Theater at all. I have to be several hundred feet away or I have to hold my breath when passing. Otherwise, I my throat will start to close and I will fall down paralyzed. Once this happens I usually get forced to go to an ER where the doctors refuse to treat me in any way except to check if I am pregnant... Sigh.
SPD and a lot of related things have definitely made me feel alone and excluded from things. My poor coordination made me the "thing" to be laughed at during school. I couldn't ever kick a ball straight, or throw it right, and I'd get lucky if I could catch it.
I've never really strayed from the foods I like, which gets me weird looks when someone takes me to a steak house and I order chicken or seafood. :/ I can't eat steak, as much as I'm sure I'd like to- it's just too thick of a texture for me.
I have to avoid anything with any kind of pepper or onion in my food- I'm oversensitive to the Capsaicin, and I can feel it burning even with just a little bit of black pepper. I can't eat anything stringy like celery, not only does the taste and texture drive me nuts, but the squeak hurts my teeth and my ears.
My tactile issues and auditory sensitivities drive me insane, and make it hard for me to go out places with people.
I've felt really depressed and anxious over it all, coupling that with social difficulties, it's no wonder I don't really have friends.
*hugs all*
(02-28-2011, 05:18 AM)beck7422 Wrote: [ -> ]Sometimes I don't know where the line between my SPD and Food Allergies is, but where they blur is definitely some of my most isolating problems. For example, I will have an allergic reaction if I inhale nuts being eaten by someone else within 10 feet of me. This distance keeps growing, they used to have to be next to me even 2 years ago. Prior to that I only reacted to nuts if I was the one who ate them. I fear it will get as bad as my Popcorn allergy which I react to inhalling it made even several hours prior, through doors, and over 200 feet away. I can not walk near a Movie Theater at all. I have to be several hundred feet away or I have to hold my breath when passing. Otherwise, I my throat will start to close and I will fall down paralyzed. Once this happens I usually get forced to go to an ER where the doctors refuse to treat me in any way except to check if I am pregnant... Sigh.
That sounds awful!
It reminds me that I'm coming to think that some of the MOST difficult medical conditions are those that just sound like annoyances or being overly sensitive (and are not given much respect in society): like food allergies, MCS, SPD, tinnitus. It is really difficult to deal with so much, without the supportive structure of people and the world getting it that it really is a big deal.
Ah, The toll is big, just today I was mercilessly tormented with words because I have SPD or people didn't believe me.
I don't have SPD my adopted son has and he is only 5. I don't know a lot about it only what I have read. Sorry if this question is in the wrong place. I wanted to ask if your senses are the same all the time or do they differ from day to day. I am finding this hard to explain. Can your senses feel worse some days than others.
(11-02-2011, 04:57 PM)Jaffa Wrote: [ -> ]I don't have SPD my adopted son has and he is only 5. I don't know a lot about it only what I have read. Sorry if this question is in the wrong place. I wanted to ask if your senses are the same all the time or do they differ from day to day. I am finding this hard to explain. Can your senses feel worse some days than others.
Yes, I have it and it differs. For me my mood affects it. To keep it from bothering your son, have hi, calm and focused on a task, preferably one that is engaging. I am a 13 year old with SPD. I hate it.
Thanks wells foster for your answer. I want to understand this condition but he is too little to explain how he feels. He is such a fast forward kid keeping him calm is really hard. He obviously doesn't know what's up with him either he just falls to the ground screaming when anything goes wrong. And as it's very new to me am now sure of the things that bother him.
I know from experience that he touches hot things and has blistered his fingers but not made a sound, he just wipes them down his trouser leg. And sounds bother him too, not quite as much as they did when he was a baby but it's still there. I didn't know if he is coping or it changes from day to day.
This condition is very hard for others who don't know anyone with it to understand and I think you are all very brave and strong to cope in such a difficult world.
Do you have any tips on how you calm yourself down that maybe beneficial to him.