Thanks Rinne!

And thanks LAC - he's 6 and already doing times tables - knows the 1(easy) and 2 times and I just taught him the 10 times(also easy) and knows the 5s in a hit & miss fashion - he seems to think 5x table can only end in 5s so when we hit the 10/20 etc he gets a little frustrated. We started on the 3 as well but it's a little trickier. It's part of the SEMAS system, which puts him - especially in SA - ahead of the curriculum. He does so well with reading (reads a grade ahead and is "leader" in his class - they have a reading record book and the first to read all the books in it gets taken out to a restaurant at the end of the year) so we wanted to balance this with a maths course - I reckoned if he was going to be trying to cope with all the SPD stuff that *could* influence his performance in class, I wanted to cover the foundation skills and hopefully help him to get a solid foundation so that when he learns to cope better in the classroom he can just take off instead of having to (perhaps) catch up on things he missed due to being so distractible and hitting shut down. The SEMAS also seems to be helping with attention span and - determination(?). The other day when we sat down to do homework he started his normal "I need water/I need an orange/I need the bathroom", routine, on the verge of getting up every 2 seconds, but I just said, no, we're going to sit and do homework now - and miracle of miracles, he just said "ok", and sat, and started.

But - as you say, when you're doing so many different things all at about the same time or close to each other, how can you really tell what it is that's working the magic? or is it everything?
I've also been considering trying a good probiotic. Read really good things on those. May just go and get one. Now if they'd only package omegas and probiotics in one yummy chewable that has no additives my live would be much simpler

Also wanted to add we switched OT from Friday afternoons to Tuesday afternoons. This seems to help him deflate and bring him down before he hits the overload point - which used to happen just almost every wednesday.

I think you may have mentioned the brain gems before - it sounds familiar. I'll have to look into it. I've also discussed listening therapy with our OT as he matches the profile for someone who could benefit from it a lot - almost perfectly. Our OT worked in the UK for 10 years and couldn't bring the equipment she used there with her, so she still needs to gather some of the normal stuff she likes to use, but she's hoping to get in August which would be great.

so... if you're a newbie and reading this: take heart. It may feel absolutely desparate and hopeless, but soon enough (hopefully) you will look up, and take stock, and realise that things are somehow, indefinably better/easier/brighter/happier.

Thanks ladies...