Believe me, Lynn, I know what you mean. I so know what you mean. I thought I was alone. I had a nervous breakdown after my worst bout of these "movies" when I was 20. I've been on and off anti-anxiety medicine for almost 20 years. And while part of my depression and anxiety is from childhood sexual and emotional abuse, now that I am an adult and have had way too many years of therapy to mention, I know that I have dealt with those on a fundamental level. It is now a physical issue, an SPD issue, that is causing me trouble. I, too, liked the Ferris wheel ok when I was a kid. I can't even contemplate it now without sheer terror overcoming me at the thought. I *still* have the driving movies on bridges, even when I have all my "helpers" working with me, like my ear buds and mp3 player and fidget item and sunglasses... It gets worse the higher, longer, and curvier the bridges. And if there's a building nearby, I *will* have a movie of crashing into the building. I can't look at people leaning against the edges of porches or stairs. I had to leave Braves stadium during a baseball game because of the panic at looking down at the field. And being able to acknowledge that I am NOT crazy and this is NOT "just in my head" has made the biggest difference for me, as well as finding strategies to help me with my SPD symptoms. Now that I don't treat my SPD as my being crazy, I can stop being quite as depressed for doing something "abnormal." I can see the doctor's sneer as being his ignorance rather than my insanity. And I can understand that, even though I do occasionally need the Paxil to help with my panic, that it's not because I'm making things up or driving myself mad. I can give myself the benefit of the doubt for the first time.

Believe me, Lynn. I know. And I'm so glad to pass it along.