We're at a public school and my older son's Kindy teacher was the one who came to us with concerns, which eventually led to an SPD diagnosis. Our school is beyond wonderful with resources and classroom help! He got an IEP (504) in 1st grade and has continued to have one through 5th grade this year. The students who needed to chew gum were allowed to chew it as long as they were responsible about it.

I would set up an appointment with his teacher and the school's social worker or psychologist. Request an IEP/504. I'd buy books to educate his teacher--and maybe the school as well.

Maybe his teacher could ask him to be the one to pass out papers or walk messages down to the office. I'm not sure what his SPD needs are, so it's hard to make other suggestions. Maybe there's another fidget toy that would be allowed. Does he have low muscle tone? My son was allowed to use a seat with a back (like ones people bring to sporting events to support the back) and use it at assemblies when he had to sit on the floor (otherwise he'd eventually be lying down on the floor). My son was overwhelmed at the start of school and the end of the day when it was chaotic from other students were putting away or getting backpacks. He'd have meltdowns, so an aide got him off the bus and brought him to the swings for 10 minutes, then when he got to class, the students were already sitting. At the end if the day an aide brought him to the library to read a book until his bus arrived.

If sounds bother him or he is distracted by them, maybe he could wear ear plugs?