Hey, I have a question.

What do people with SPD do to get through weddings? My boyfriend has SPD and he says weddings are probably the worst and hardest thing. Not only does he have to wear uncomfortable nice clothes which constantly irritate him, but he has to spend hours around people, laughing, cheering, perfumes, lights, etc. On top of that, people expect him to be super happy and can't understand if he's not or keeps having to go outside to take breaks. And finally, there's the dancing that you're pretty much forced to do after being completely over-stimulated and exhausted. He says it's just hours of his heart racing and feeling unbearably anxious. It sounds torturous.

We have some friends (2 different couples) who are getting married this Fall and have to reply to the invites soon. One couple we're super close with and my boyfriend is a groomsmen so we gotta go. But we're not AS close to the other couple. I really wanna go together but my boyfriend says he doesn't want to because he wont enjoy it and it's too much for someone he's not super close to. Even though he wont/can't enjoy his best friend's wedding, he's going because it's his best friend and he wants to support them.

I wish there was something we could do to make it easier for him. Does anyone have any suggestions?


Is there anyone else who has a significant other with SPD? I feel so horribly selfish so much of the time. I love my boyfriend so much and we're gonna find ways to make everything work, but I wouldn't mind hearing from other people who can relate to my selfishness - my selfish desires to just go to parties and have my boyfriend with me...to not have to keep explaining to people that my boyfriend isn't anti-social or hates people...

And if anyone has tips for how I can be less selfish and more understanding, I would greatly appreciate that. I think it's really just gonna take me time to adapt and change my expectations about our relationship. But if anyone has any other suggestion, please share!

thanks, and sorry for the ranting.