I am so happy to have found some place like this. I have yet to meet another mother who has a little girl with a SPD. Most people i met have never heard of this, or they feel their children's problems are worse than mine and shrug me off. I am hoping to find others who get it,

I have one child, a little girl named Samara. By the age of 2 she didn't speak, or know her name. I asked her doctor about this, and she told me she was probably fine, but would put in a consult for early intervention services.

When we started, she was over a year behind in every aspect. It was soon clear she had a sensory disorder. She is a sensory fluxuator. In some ways she craves input, deep pressure, and lots of spinning and movement. In other ways she rejects it, lights, noise, crowds, texture. She couldn't make eye contact, and still is unable too.

The more I learned the more I see she has always had this. By 4 months she wanted to wear sunglasses. When she started solids, she didn't like the texture of it and couldn't swallow it.

With therapy she blossomed, it was like we found our little girl. We knew she was in there somewhere, and we found her. She now talks, and we can go to stores now. She still struggles with social interactions, but is incredibly smart. Her delays are considered staggered.

When she turned 3 she was dropped by the state for all therapies, and we didn't qualify for school services. (her disorder by their definition was not educationally based, and therefore does not require intervention.) When therapy stopped she regressed quickly, and it has taken me months to get her back to where she was. She has made some progress but it is slower now.

I find it difficult to see my friends children who are younger surpassing her, and the moms gushing over their children's accomplishments, and then telling me how different Samara is. (as if I hadn't noticed.)

I have her in mainstream private preschool, and then her babysitter is aware of her challenges, and is trying to be understanding and work with her to the best of her ability. I am grateful for parents and siblings who are supportive of us, and have tried to help understand her. Her father still struggles with the meltdowns, and communication barriers.

Samara loves movies, and learning. Right now she is obsessed with animals, and the zoo. She tells me she is going to be a zoo doctor.

I am in school full time, I am studying psychology, and I love it. I will also have a degree in art. Her father works full time and is in school to become an electrcian. We are both gone a lot right now. I see just how hard it is on her when the routines change from day to day or semester to semester. I have yet to figure out how to help her there.

I really do enjoy spending time with my daughter, I do think she is simply fantastic. I have always said I have the right child, and she has the right mother. We don't always understand each other but we love each other.

I am excited to be here, and look forward to getting to know more of you.