About two years ago we realized that my 5 year old (then 3), was still not having a successful Potty training experience but we never imagined that it was anything other than just being stubborn and uninterested in it. His level of activity and energy lead us to believe that he would possibly have ADHD (I myself was diagnosed with it at age 7), which was upsetting that he would have to go through what I went through, but also I could relate to him and be able to help him in his day to day life with it. When he was 4, I spoke with his Dr around Christmastime about my concerns about his potty issues and she suggested he see a Behavioral Therapist so we did. After a few sessions, she suggested that he might possibly have mild ADHD, but also that he showed signs of SPD and she explained what that was. In May I took him to a Psychologist and she confirmed the SPD and that he could still have issues with toileting for years to come, and recomended an OT, but that was something beyond my affordability. She then told me that once he started Kindergarten, the school system would have their own OT that could work with him. I work for a school district but I live in another and I obtained permission for him to attend the district I work for and I was up front and forthcoming about his SPD and his issues. I met with the Sped Teacher and a Kindergarten teacher before school started and gave permission for his records to be obtained from his Drs. I signed the agreement that he would be evaluated and observed and the plan with his toileting would be put into effect until November 15th at which time we would meet again and discuss whether or not he would remain in a mainstream Kindergarten with an OT, or if he needed more one on one attention. He started Kindergarten, went through the normal anxiety's of his first school experience, and after one week, he was happy and learning and flourishing. For the first two weeks it was great. Then they changed the daily routine and started branching out for different classes instead of staying in the same room the whole time. That change in routine threw him off and he began to have trouble and acted out by becoming defiant. I don't allow him to use his SPD as an excuse to misbehave or be disrespectful, but he still is too young to understand what it is and to say 'hey, I don't like this change in my routine it's making me ......." whatever his issue may be. He was able to overcome it and settle down over the next week. On Sept 26th, the Principal pulled me into the office and told me that she wanted to remove him from school, that I needed to take him home and work with him. Really?? I was shocked! He was learning and he was happy and he was making progress, no matter how small it may have been. I told her that breaking his routine and taking his stability away was going to cause him more anxiety and issues, but she didn't care. I convinced her to allow him to remain in school for half a day and she agreed. The following week he began half day and even that little break in the routine caused him some problems but he was ok with going home of course. The following friday, she pulled me aside again and told me that I needed to remove him and didn't give me any choice, she wanted him out. I was so angry, shocked, disappointed to say the least and I told her that she was denying him an education because of his disorder and how was that fair? But she did not care, she told me to take him home, have my babysitter (for my 2 year old) work with him, or take him to my own school district, she had already had his stuff brought up and it was in the floor of the office when I left the conference room. I have tried to contact the Superintendent twice with no response. My son has since started Kindergarten in a school in our own District but she made it very clear that my son did not matter to her simply because he did not live in their district. Not only did he start biting his nails down to the skin again because of his routine being abruptly taken away, he also began to have more ticks, had trouble sleeping, acted out alot more, but he kept asking when he could go back to school to see his friends. My husband and I were appalled that this could happen. We have every intentions of filing complaints and I have even considered going to the Local News stations to get the word out and hold them accountable. I have the copy of the agreement about his being evaluated and his needs identified and I can prove she breached that agreement, but the Department of Education has also suggested we file a Civil Rights Complaint against the Principal. I realize my job could be in jeopardy over this and if that is the case, so be it, for my son I will give up everything I have. My boss and co-workers have been extremely encouraging and supportive. My husband and I right now want to allow our son to get used to his new school and new teachers, as well as hold the Principal accountable for her actions and try to get the word out to prevent this kind of thing from happening again. Sorry to be so long winded, I pray this hasn't happened to any of you, but I am sure that it is an unfortunate circumstance in many of the lives of our children with SPD and other similar disorders. [/font]

(10-26-2014, 10:25 PM)SophiaTheFirst Wrote: About two years ago we realized that my 5 year old (then 3), was still not having a successful Potty training experience but we never imagined that it was anything other than just being stubborn and uninterested in it. His level of activity and energy lead us to believe that he would possibly have ADHD (I myself was diagnosed with it at age 7), which was upsetting that he would have to go through what I went through, but also I could relate to him and be able to help him in his day to day life with it. When he was 4, I spoke with his Dr around Christmastime about my concerns about his potty issues and she suggested he see a Behavioral Therapist so we did. After a few sessions, she suggested that he might possibly have mild ADHD, but also that he showed signs of SPD and she explained what that was. In May I took him to a Psychologist and she confirmed the SPD and that he could still have issues with toileting for years to come, and recomended an OT, but that was something beyond my affordability. She then told me that once he started Kindergarten, the school system would have their own OT that could work with him. I work for a school district but I live in another and I obtained permission for him to attend the district I work for and I was up front and forthcoming about his SPD and his issues. I met with the Sped Teacher and a Kindergarten teacher before school started and gave permission for his records to be obtained from his Drs. I signed the agreement that he would be evaluated and observed and the plan with his toileting would be put into effect until November 15th at which time we would meet again and discuss whether or not he would remain in a mainstream Kindergarten with an OT, or if he needed more one on one attention. He started Kindergarten, went through the normal anxiety's of his first school experience, and after one week, he was happy and learning and flourishing. For the first two weeks it was great. Then they changed the daily routine and started branching out for different classes instead of staying in the same room the whole time. That change in routine threw him off and he began to have trouble and acted out by becoming defiant. I don't allow him to use his SPD as an excuse to misbehave or be disrespectful, but he still is too young to understand what it is and to say 'hey, I don't like this change in my routine it's making me ......." whatever his issue may be. He was able to overcome it and settle down over the next week. On Sept 26th, the Principal pulled me into the office and told me that she wanted to remove him from school, that I needed to take him home and work with him. Really?? I was shocked! He was learning and he was happy and he was making progress, no matter how small it may have been. I told her that breaking his routine and taking his stability away was going to cause him more anxiety and issues, but she didn't care. I convinced her to allow him to remain in school for half a day and she agreed. The following week he began half day and even that little break in the routine caused him some problems but he was ok with going home of course. The following friday, she pulled me aside again and told me that I needed to remove him and didn't give me any choice, she wanted him out. I was so angry, shocked, disappointed to say the least and I told her that she was denying him an education because of his disorder and how was that fair? But she did not care, she told me to take him home, have my babysitter (for my 2 year old) work with him, or take him to my own school district, she had already had his stuff brought up and it was in the floor of the office when I left the conference room. I have tried to contact the Superintendent twice with no response. My son has since started Kindergarten in a school in our own District but she made it very clear that my son did not matter to her simply because he did not live in their district. Not only did he start biting his nails down to the skin again because of his routine being abruptly taken away, he also began to have more ticks, had trouble sleeping, acted out alot more, but he kept asking when he could go back to school to see his friends. My husband and I were appalled that this could happen. We have every intentions of filing complaints and I have even considered going to the Local News stations to get the word out and hold them accountable. I have the copy of the agreement about his being evaluated and his needs identified and I can prove she breached that agreement, but the Department of Education has also suggested we file a Civil Rights Complaint against the Principal. I realize my job could be in jeopardy over this and if that is the case, so be it, for my son I will give up everything I have. My boss and co-workers have been extremely encouraging and supportive. My husband and I right now want to allow our son to get used to his new school and new teachers, as well as hold the Principal accountable for her actions and try to get the word out to prevent this kind of thing from happening again. Sorry to be so long winded, I pray this hasn't happened to any of you, but I am sure that it is an unfortunate circumstance in many of the lives of our children with SPD and other similar disorders. [/font]

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Ooops. Sorry to post without finishing the reply. Our son is very similar in that he was unable to potty training for poop until just before he turned five, and he still has an accident from time to time. It's amazing to me that a well-meaning, totally positive and involved school staff had no clue that SPD was a factor in potty training. I had one person actually recommend a biopsy for celiac disease. (not a medical person, but school staffer). They thought he was being willful, resistant, defiant - as if it was all a behavioral choice.

It's always darkest before the dawn. Kids go through phases and although the SPD kids seem to have longer phases of behavior things will change in time and that goes for learning potty training, language skills etc. OTs, Speech Therapy and PTs when they are little go a long way. If the kid qualifies see if you an Early Childhood Intervention program and get those therapies for little to no cost.

Thank you for your reply. He has since started another school and is doing remarkably well. They noticed some other signs that I had not and has also advised me that he might also have Asbergers Syndrome and that also plays a role in his potty skills. They have not started his OT yet because of the switching schools and getting something new introduced into his Routine will take some time so we are going to start fresh with toilet training in April after Spring Break. My biggest concern now is that it's going to take longer than a couple of months and the school won't allow him into first grade until he is Potty Trained but the therapist doesn't agree with that because he is so smart and learns so quickly especially with Math that holding him back will not help him to progress emotionally which is also going to support his self confidence. Thank you for the ECI program suggestion I will look into that.