Hi there,
I'm just wondering if anyone could offer any advice for me to
Stop my daughter from screaming in kids faces. She will be playing
And then all of a sudden she will yell in so skids face. I have tried
Telling her that the Kds are scared when she does it, that kids won't
Want to play with her. I've tried asking her why? She says different
Reasons each time. I've tried getting different faces sad, angry, happy, shocked
And got her to explain how she feels before she does it and then how the
Other kids is feeling once she has done it. I have t had much luck because
Each time I ask her she changes it. I'm wondering if anyone out there has any other suggestions????? Ideas????? Advice????? I have managed to get her from
Neally strangling my next by squeezing it to now coming up to
Me and squeezing my arm (so much better) then I ask her if she wants me to squeeze her. I am starting to realise with SPD you can't get them to stop some things all together but trying to modify it or minimise it is good.

My son used to do that when he got frustrated with the person he was with. That was after he used to bite, hit, then we went to screaming, now it is telling people they suck. I feel it all comes from frustration with that person they are dealing with. Have something with her that clams her down that she can go to when she gets frustrated. Teach her a coping skill she can use that is more appropriate, getting upset with a friend shake it off, teach her to shake her hands like shaking water off of them, they visualize things, she will see in her mind the problem flying off of her hands if you describe it to her that way. Three shakes and the problem is gone. Like Dorothy clicking her heels with her ruby red slippers. Sounds silly but remember we are dealing with kids so we have to make it fun. I have had parents tell me that they have taught their kids to "blow away" their melt down and the kids actually exhale, to them they are literally blowing away their problem and it works, but it takes time and repatition. Remind her to use her words over and over again with her friends, role play a scenerio that you have seen happen. While you are doing this you be her and show her how she should have reacted. First scream in her face ( yes I am serious) then do it again with the proper reaction. I am sorry , some might not agree, but she needs to know how she is making others feel! Sometimes we don't realize what we are doing until it is done to us. Hope some of this helps. Oh yeah, while she is playing, she might need to take a break to calm down with something, you might have to redirect her until she figures out how to do it on her own.

Thank you. I will try it bc I am afraid kids will stop playing with
Her. (they already do) I'm so worried she is going to not have friends
That I'm always trying to drill in to her what a good friend does.
I have kept her back from school this year so I have one more year
To try and tackle the big issues. You do t happen to know any resources do you for
Reaching them to be good friends? Videos? Or books or anything?

I am sure someone can, I always just had him out there and dealt with the behavior as it came. Our library always had story time, a play area, play dates with good friends of mine that have kids with similar ages and understand the issues, thankfully, because he belted my friends daughter twice and gave her a bloody nose each time! Don't be afraid to have her do things, this is life and she needs to learn to adapt just with more tools then most kids! Go to school and talk to the school's social worker, ask her about different groups and what books she can suggest. I will ask my son's social worker as well that he sees. He has group time with her and these are things he is still working on! He is in third grade, but I had him in school at 3. Get it going! Remember sometimes they listen better to outside people, like a teacher. Kids will come and go but when she does find that one friend they will stay no matter what. I have had to endure kids calling my son crazy. It hurts like hell, but kids are mean when they don't understand. Socialization is so important and never worry about what some other adult thinks, just be close by when she is playing with other kids, take her for breaks, bring her weighted blanket with and say "Maybe you need to take a little break right now." You never know she might like that classroom setting, a lot of them do because of the routine and structure! I will write my son's social worker tomorrow and ask her about some books. I'll let you know what I hear! there will always be big issues, once one is gone another pops up so don't stress yourself out. She will be fine and so will you. Try her in a half day program, fill up that back pack with heavy stuff and get her a sit fit cushion, lap pad, etc and give her time. She will eventually get it, but the longer you want the harder it will be for her to adjust.

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