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+--- Thread: Married life (/thread-630.html)
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RE: Married life - shorrocksalot24 - 06-16-2012
Tuttleturtle (I love turtles! my goal every summer is to rescue at least one off of a roadway! already happened this year!! lol) In desperation, a few summers ago, I searched, and found swimmer ones. They were awful, cheap and hurt to wear - but I would imagine that they have more comfortable ones for professional swimmers. Honestly, while I wish my senses were not so heightened all of the time, I cant handle "not" having them either (like nose plugs, or ear plugs) I find that the absence of my senses is just as anxiety provoking. I guess that is the PTSD at work. It feels like suddenly going blind to me, and I am in a state of panic then.
Amygdalia, I did by the sound screen, with fear that the "wobble" would be possible. Funny how that stuff always happens. I know that I often find myself feeling guilty for trying to help myself, only to have wasted the money ultimately, for reasons that others without SPD do not understand. Vacuums!! I have had a million - I want to vacuum - but it sends me over the edge in so many ways that I never fully understood. I literally thought that my mother must have beat the hell out of me with one or something. You know - to have such a melt down over one - seems over the top, when you have a friend that vacuums her house everday. Then I learned of my SPD. I have had so many issues with fans, air purifiers, air conditioners, - omg - you name it. I Curse the people that made TV volumes flux with commercials! I curse surround sound massively. This is a thing that my husband wishes he could use - I thought (5 years ago) that, being the electronic savy one, I would hook it up for him. I got it to work, much to my horror. Luckily - he cant figure out how to work it himself! Its now just a big eye sore in my living room, that I am (daily) trying to figure out how to dispose of!!!
I seriously researched SPD about 3 years ago, read all I could - knew it was me 100% - but still denied it and put it away for years. Recently I began reaching out - especially after the biggest fail of an attempt to vacation with my husband and kids for 3 days. It was a complete disaster for me. But the hardest - always - is the roll of the eyes from your significant other. Second is the lack of effort you would hope they would put in, to try to understand your real condition. I gave my husband my book (too loud, too bright, too fast, too tight) and told him that bent pages, highlights, and underscores - were made 3 years ago. If he cared much anymore - he should read it, and try to understand what I am going through. He literally asked if the magic switch would be in this book to change me. Then explained to me that, he tried to understand 15 different diagnosis in the last 15 years (of our 20yrs) - in HIS opinion for nothing - which is a bunch of &*%. I understand a frustration level of others, but I cant comprehend the lack of empathy in my own husband. My boys, have been far more understanding - because they have been there, with me, and he is a mere visitor.(meaning he works a lot, in his own business - the true love of his life) No disrespect to him, but when my kids get it, and he doesnt, what can I say??? There is a lack of empathy to my struggles - which makes me feel very alone in it. I am glad to have reached out (finally) on a site, that other adults understand.
I believe that my youngest has SPD too. I am very happy that I have always had the ability to read his emotions and properly help him - even though I had no idea there were disorders at play. Reading posts and articles on here are of such value to me, its been a lonely, scary world, but it helps to know I am not the only one.
Have you always had a severe level or is it becoming more severe?? I have always had it, but it was not until 2008 that it skyrocketed for me (unbearably) and just in the last 2 years - going off of all meds, and in the last 6 months - not drinking a drop. The full scale of my situation is forcing me to acknowlege it. Thats a start. I give myself props for managing life for so long, and having the most amazing children, and such wonderful relashionships with them, they let me know how special our bonds are. So how lucky I am to have the ability to relate to them on all levels, probably because of the need to do that my whole life - to survive. Not everyone can claim that!
Sorry this is so long! But it feels nice to communicate with others! And hopefully makes other know they are not alone either!
RE: Married life - beck7422 - 06-17-2012
Everyone curses the people who make the TV volumes flux with commercials. They are Evil and should be punished...
I have had sensory quirks all my life. It didn't become a serious problem until I was an adult. I don't know the exact date my senses went from weird to insane, but it was a fast transition over a period of about 10 years. Seems like a contradiction, but I would definitely say in K-12th grade years my sensory issues wouldn't have qualified as SPD. I started having funky regular health problems in college and every 3 months I seemed to add a new problem or one of my previous sensory problems would get worse.
RE: Married life - shorrocksalot24 - 06-18-2012
As I was reading more yesterday - I remembered that - not only did things intensify after child birth, but I became allergic to my own progesterone (seriously) and in 2005 ended up getting a total hysterectomy - desensitizing was a complete failure. This was after years of noticing that I became a mess - a complete mess - with the surge of the hormones. Really a bizzare story. At first my body was found to not be producing enough progesterone - I was prescribed a cream - which nearly killed me - I ended up in a hospital, and had temperorary paralisis on one side. Then I ended up in TX (I live in PA) where big allergy doctor practiced. First we tried to desensitize me, then a chemical induced menopause - which showed complete improvement - so I agreed to the hysterectomy. The next two years are fuzzy - I went through such depression, that I was given ECT - 15x and lost a two + year window of memory. Hormones and other health play a massive role. Funny how the doctor, that delivered my first child, told me at a check up visit (when I was already in the throws of Baby Blues) that womens hormones do not change just because we give birth! I sure am glad that I gave birth to 2 boys. Because I dont want them to go through what I did in my late 20's and 30's - even now!
I would sure agree with you on the not qualifying - in my case - before child birth. But the signs were around. I just assumed that my child hood did not leave room for a full bloom of it. Now, there is nothing stopping it, I dont even have to protect my kids anymore from it - they understand.
Tv volume fluxes! Evil indeed!
RE: Married life - beck7422 - 06-21-2012
shorrock, did you have multiple experiences of paralysis at all or just that one time?
The reason I ask is I have Hypokalemic Periodic Paralysis and some women with it don't experience their first big paralysis attack until soon after childbirth.
I have a lot of problems with hormones, but Estrogen seems to be my poison. I can't take birth control at all without triggering paralysis attacks.
RE: Married life - shorrocksalot24 - 06-21-2012
(06-21-2012, 02:53 AM)beck7422 Wrote: shorrock, did you have multiple experiences of paralysis at all or just that one time?
The reason I ask is I have Hypokalemic Periodic Paralysis and some women with it don't experience their first big paralysis attack until soon after childbirth.
I have a lot of problems with hormones, but Estrogen seems to be my poison. I can't take birth control at all without triggering paralysis attacks.
Hi, That particular time - it was definitely the cream(in 04). I have had, and currently have, muscular problems. The most severe things that I can recall, are all medicine related. I am not familiar with Hypokalemic Periodic Paralysis. I cant take Ambien - the only time it was given to me in a hospital - and I woke with massive leg pains. Another time - I was given a type of psychiatric med, and dropped right to the floor in back spasms - that did not stop until I took a drug to combat that. I always have muscle pain these days. I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia in 08. I have always been extremely sensitive to meds, and never in a good way
I will check out Hypokalemic Periodic Paralysis - I am always interested in learning anything and everything! 
RE: Married life - Indy1 - 09-27-2012
Hi,
Have you tried any neurofeedback? I did a kind of neurofeedback called Zengar and it was amazing. I have been on so many drugs for so many things, and here was this totally passive thing that just put me in the most relaxed zone imaginable. I wanted to stay there forever. Anyway, I got my insurance to cover it as biofeedback for migraines, The thereapist would hook me up to the bifeedback machine at the same time she was doing the Zengar. It really helped tone down my reactivity to things and made me feel pretty elated.
One caveat..the Zengar website indicates that the machine does it all and so the skill of the practitioner is not so important. I can tell you that this is not true. I went to two different people for this. With one person i felt like my skull was going to explode. With the other, I was in heaven. She also did EFT, which I did not like, but many people do, and you can learn to do it yourself.
Let me know if you want more info.
Indy1