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+--- Thread: Seeker's dad here (finally) (/thread-1434.html)
Seeker's dad here (finally) - MPJetset - 10-18-2014
I was 50, pretty sure by then I knew a little about everything, and then BAM God sent our little sensory-seeker. I was different as a child, too, so have an inkling of what he's thinking but thanks to your good work here I understand that I have had no idea of what he's FEELING. That'll be my first research - how to relate as best I can and then provide fatherly support and guidance.
My wife was the real catalyst for my arriving here - without her I'd still be of the "everybody's dealing with something" mentality and "he'll need to learn to cope with whatever it is." These are true enough, but it's bigger than that and so is a parent's role.
Seeking out information once you hear the SPD diagnosis the first time is a very depressing journey - you'll get a hundred hits containing posts from desperate parents, creepy, like troubled voices emanating from a kind of hell. Perhaps not coincidentally, many of them are not good writers as though they're tapping out pleas for help on cell phones at 2:30 AM, frightened, sleep-deprived and alone in the dark. Sheesh.
While I got glimpses from these hits of our own situation, as you know there's a wide array of conditions so it felt a bit hopeless until I was able to drill-down on support websites. What a terrific job you have done here - I don't get all the child psychology but I sure can relate to adults... particularly adults who recognize a difference in themselves. Like I wrote - I can relate to that, but this would be another topic on another board.
My five year old is all-boy, fun as can be for an athletic mom and dad, smart, funny and loving. He is a true pleasure. My wife did all the tough research and soul-searching when he was three, so many of the problems have been minimized.
He still has trouble keeping his hands to himself, has a limited diet, and encopresis. As a result he has a lot of trouble in kindergarten and socializing, though my wife has done such a terrific job with him that you'd hardly notice it. In fact, our school district can't figure him out - he's very well adjusted.
I get a little teary when I think of how fortunate he is because of his mother's hard, early work, and how hard he tries. My heart absolutely breaks for children going undiagnosed without understanding from their parents, peers, teachers, etc.
But, as they say, "everybody's got something" and "he'll need to learn to cope with whatever it is." These are true enough, and with your hard work here it'll be a little easier on many children and adults with SPD.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
RE: Seeker's dad here (finally) - Dani - 11-28-2014
Well hello there, sir! Welcome to SPD Support. Apologies for the delay, heh. Unfortunately, it can be quite a bit of work to grow an active community in the SPD world. I'm glad you like what you see here.
Sounds like you have have a great son there. Has he been to an occupational therapist yet? If not, I highly recommend it, hehe. It appears that he has two amazing parents though, so I am confident he can grow up to be an amazing adult version of a great kid you have now, despite the difficulties.
Feel free to post around and try to start up some conversations. This place can get pretty active once people get going. Welcome. again