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+--- Thread: Hello,very newbie here... (/thread-195.html)
Hello,very newbie here... - silence6666 - 12-06-2010
I am in the process of getting an spd diag... and just doing tons of research. This group/website was suggested to me and I am very glad to find it.
How many adults with spd are here because I would love to hear from you!!!!
Metal music, cats, computers and teaching special edu make up my life. I have learned many coping tricks from watching my students over the years but have not until the last four months had a possible label for what is going on with me.
I look foward to lots more learning......
Karen
RE: Hello,very newbie here... - mawkinberd - 12-07-2010
Hi Karen!
SPD adult here. I just got my diagnosis in July, and I've primarily been doing research and coping on my own. Luckily, I've found some great advice and information here and elsewhere that has made a big difference for me, particularly in my most difficult situations, like driving. (shiver) Plus, with that understanding, I'm learning to be easier on myself and be less negative. It's been a good journey for me.Metal music: yes, but in moderation.
Cats: Love them! We have a wonderful stray that is very friendly and loving to us, and I'm enjoying getting to know him, even if I do accidently tickle him on the belly! lol Computers: Don't know what I'd do without them! Teaching special ed: You are a brave woman. I wish I had the patience and/or ability to deal. I have so many sensitivities, it's hard for me to deal well with more than two or three people at a time, especially if I'm in charge of them. I'm impressed that you were able to use techniques that your students used to help yourself. I'm glad you gave yourself permission to do that. For a long time, I wouldn't allow myself to do that because I was told not to when I was younger.Is there anything in particular you would like to know about? Are you struggling with anything currently or looking for a particular bit of info? Feel free to post and look around. There are actually several adult types here with SPD, and most of them are way more knowledgable than I am, having been on the wagon longer.
But I'm glad to share the journey with you.Welcome, and Cheers!
RE: Hello,very newbie here... - silence6666 - 12-07-2010
Yea how do you live with/have a relationship with someone if you are touch sensitive among other things and how the hell do you explain this to them lol....
I have read about a lot of spd folks who are happily married etc.. how does this happen?
(12-07-2010, 01:55 PM)mawkinberd Wrote: Hi Karen!
Metal music: yes, but in moderation.
Is there anything in particular you would like to know about? Are you struggling with anything currently or looking for a particular bit of info? Feel free to post and look around. There are actually several adult types here with SPD, and most of them are way more knowledgable than I am, having been on the wagon longer.
Welcome, and Cheers!
RE: Hello,very newbie here... - mawkinberd - 12-07-2010
Explain? Heck, getting the right words for this is next to impossible! lol
In my case, it worked out naturally because of other issues that I have. We had to deal early on with my sexuality issues because I was sexually abused as a kid as well as emotionally and mentally. He is a sensitive guy, so we worked together on things. He was willing to stop when I said stop, he was willing to listen when I said I needed to tell him about something, and he seriously tries to do what I ask when I ask. All the ingredients of a good marriage, regardless of what each person brings to the table.
Mind you, it is definitely a struggle. And we are not without issues. When I first got the diagnosis, explaining it to him was a challenge. But, he knew that I wasn't making it up. After all, I had been struggling for so long with all the issues, and none of the "normal" things had been helping. He knew me well enough to know that, when the things I was doing worked, I felt better. He could see a difference in me and my life. He knew that it was working. And because he loves me, he is supporting me. Mind you, he might give me a look like "say what?!" when I first tell him about what I want to do for this or that. But he goes along, and he tries, and he loves. And that's really all I can ask.
As for starting the relationship, yes, it was a huge challenge. But I guess it was the right time for both of us. I really don't know what else to say about that; since attraction is, at best, a form of temporary insanity, I guess you can judge that for yourself. lol
RE: Hello,very newbie here... - beck7422 - 12-11-2010
SPD Adult here.
Light touches are bad for me, deep touches are wonderful for me. Our physical relationship is built mostly on hugs. I have other health problems other than SPD that makes sex difficult, so we don't "go all the way" often.
My husband's respect for my health problems is a major part of our solid relationship.
RE: Hello,very newbie here... - silence6666 - 12-12-2010
You folks in loving relationships are very lucky,, when I married he said/thought he could handle things.. lets just say we are divorced lolz........
(12-11-2010, 03:37 AM)beck7422 Wrote: SPD Adult here.
Light touches are bad for me, deep touches are wonderful for me. Our physical relationship is built mostly on hugs. I have other health problems other than SPD that makes sex difficult, so we don't "go all the way" often.
My husband's respect for my health problems is a major part of our solid relationship.
RE: Hello,very newbie here... - mawkinberd - 12-12-2010
I'm definitely fortunate. But I will say, it is hard work on both our parts. But definitely worth it, for both of us.
RE: Hello,very newbie here... - Ourfishies - 12-12-2010
Engaged to someone with with touch sensitivity. It's a challenge but we make it work. We're in this together.
When he first explained it to me I thought it was some psychological condition. Researching online, at the library, and joining this forum helped me to understand more. Once I understood a little bit more of what he experiences, it helped me to be more sensitive and aware of the things that bother him. For example, I try my hardest not to surprise him with a hug from behind and try to be understanding when he wants some down time in between a day involving lots of noisy people. Listening to my fiance's story and the stories of others with SPD really helped me to be more understanding and not take his touch sensitivity as rejection.
That's awesome that you teach special ed! I'm a support worker doing after school care for a girl with a disability and her younger sister.
welcome to the forum
RE: Hello,very newbie here... - LynnNBoys - 12-17-2010
Hi, Karen, I'm new here too!
I'm not officially diagnosed but am pretty sure I have SPD tendencies. I'm married with 2 sons, my older son is officially diagnosed with SPD. Through him, I've been learning about myself. Hubby and I have had our ups and downs but are trying our best. I don't think I have too much trouble with touch sensitivity. Though I have noticed that I prefer to be the one who does the touching rather than the other way around. If he tries to snuggle up to me in bed at night, I feel like I'm suffocating. But I'm fine if I'm the one to put an arm around him. And spooning seems to be fine too.
Looking forward to getting to know you all!