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+--- Thread: My son can't feel if he needs to wee or pooh - anyone else had this? (/thread-368.html)
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My son can't feel if he needs to wee or pooh - anyone else had this? - Kate06 - 07-14-2011
Hi guys, I am new to this website but just searching for answers to help my 6 year old son. He was completely toilet trained by 3 but then started having accidents at 3.5yrs. Since then he has frequent times when he has urine on his shorts and faecal soiling in his underpants. He says he cannot feel he needs to go. We have had 3 years of treatment with stool softeners with no improvement. I would love to hear any thoughts you might have...
RE: My son can't feel if he needs to wee or pooh - anyone else had this? - beck7422 - 07-14-2011
He needs a schedule where he forces himself to use the restroom every few hours. Even if he doesn't think he needs to go, he has to force himself to try. If he gets constipated add more greens to his diet. He might protest the vegetables, but they help with constipation.
I tend to get the "Must find a bathroom NOW" urge and then only have 30sec to a 1 min to get to one in time. Scheduling regular restroom breaks helped lower how often these kind of potential accidents were happening. Basically regularly relieving the pressure on my bladder gave me more control.
RE: My son can't feel if he needs to wee or pooh - anyone else had this? - LynnNBoys - 07-15-2011
My older son is/was a bit like that. He wasn't diagnosed yet when we were potty training him. Started around 2 1/2 and it didn't click with him until just days before his 4th birthday. In hindsight he either didn't feel the sensation of needing to go or didn't associate the sensation with needing to go. None of the tricks worked. He was night trained around 3 1/2 before he was day trained.
Early on, scheduling potty breaks is important. The "Before/after" rule works well. After he wakes up, before we go in the car, before getting in the bath, before going to bed. He's 10 now and is a lot better. He's good about eating a variety of food so constipation isn't an issue, but he doesn't wipe very well so has skid marks here and there. Up until he was 8-9, he would tell me that his rear end hurt--it was because he wasn't wiping well enough and he needed Desitin cream. We're getting him on a more frequent shower schedule so that helps too. Now and then he'll tell me that he needs new underwear because his are wet (damp really, just a few drops).
Maybe a timer would work at home. Set it for every couple of hours. Give reminders if you see him doing the pee-pee dance. Set a few times as Scheduled Bathroom Breaks.
My younger son will be 7 in September. He was easy to day train, right before his 3rd birthday. He'll get a few drops in his underwear now and then, but he's more because he doesn't want to stop playing. His issue is night time wetting. He's still in Pull-ups at night. It runs in my family so I'm thinking we have another couple of years of Pull-ups.
I don't make it a big deal. Just get them clean underwear and remind them about going to the bathroom more often
RE: My son can't feel if he needs to wee or pooh - anyone else had this? - Valkyrie - 09-10-2011
This is the one subject I never understood about myself, until learning about SPD. I have suffered lifelong issues with what I thought was regular constipation - however, it would be as long as 3 weeks before I would actually go. When I finally do get a sensation to go, I don't think it is actually a "normal" sensation. I get what seems to be (sorry.. this is not a nice description and slightly embarrassing) like my rear end is sweating and a slight pressure. That is the only sensation I get alerting me that I have to go.
As for the potty end of things, I just have to remember to go, or at other times it is a sudden urge that can not be ignored or delayed. If I feel it, it is near too late. I also get a type of "stomach ache" that I relate to having to go when i forget too long.
I think that paying attention to the other things going on, like the stomach ache is a way to teach him. If, he has any "tells" that is. I wish you the best.
RE: My son can't feel if he needs to wee or pooh - anyone else had this? - LynnNBoys - 09-10-2011
I've read that SPDers may have a tendency to alternate between constipation and diarrhea, like Irritable Bowel Syndrome sort of symptoms. I'm not sure how true this is but my younger son seems to exhibit symptoms like this.
RE: My son can't feel if he needs to wee or pooh - anyone else had this? - nlcampbell - 09-15-2011
Same here. my son will be 4 on sunday and has been potty trained for about 1 year. He too does'nt wipe good, and he trouble telling the diffrence between gas and bowel movements frequently. but he has shown much improvement with a "potty schedule " .
~nikki
RE: My son can't feel if he needs to wee or pooh - anyone else had this? - Bub'sMommy - 09-15-2011
We too, have a potty schedule. Ryan has been potty trained since June 2011(he'll be 6 next week). He never showed any interest, OR that he even had a clue when he had to go. And then one day, it clicked. He decided he didn't want to wear pull ups, he put on his Toy Story big boy underwear and that was it. He had 2 accidents, and from then on has peed in the potty. Pooping is another story, though. He will still go in his underwear if I don't catch him in time. I don't know if it's that he can't tell until it's "too late" or he has the general fear of pooping on the potty. But we just keep working at it...one day he'll get it.
RE: My son can't feel if he needs to wee or pooh - anyone else had this? - mira - 09-18-2011
It is part of SPD definitely. Google: Interoception, the 8th sense. I was surprised to learn this when I was blogging.
RE: My son can't feel if he needs to wee or pooh - anyone else had this? - Jaffa - 10-14-2011
I am glad to read this thread. I am new on her only just got a diagnosis for my 5 year old this week. So everything is overwhelming.
He is adopted but I have had him from birth. I have said from very early on there was something that I couldn't put my finger on that was not "normal". I have four other children and he doesn't act like them. Some things are completely odd.
Like this one. He has accidents in the poo department only. He tells me it gets there too soon. I thought he was being lazy or getting engrossed in playing. He also has a problem wiping which I couldn't understand but the fog is clearing slightly.
But I am glad to read this problem could be part of this condition.
RE: My son can't feel if he needs to wee or pooh - anyone else had this? - LAC1961 - 07-09-2012
I know this thread is a little old, but I'm going to post to try to revive it. My 5 y.o. daughter was just diagnosed with SPD, sensory seeker. Potty training her has been and continues to be a nightmare. We have tried EVERYTHING!! Her success never lasts more than 2 weeks. I think she misses the wet feeling after a couple of weeks of using the toilet and just throws in the towel. She will be starting OT in a couple of weeks, and potty training is #1 on our priority list. We were afraid to put her back in Pull Ups because we felt like we would sabotage her success, but after 18 months of cleaning up pee, we just couldn't handle the stress and put her back in Pull Ups. We saw every specialist known to man, and no one could explain why this was happening. Then one day her speech therapist made a passing comment about reading the book The Out of Sync Child. Wow! I was stunned when I read it and had her evaluated within two weeks. We've tried timed voiding, a potty watch, rewards of every kind (candy, stickers, toys, computer games, movies), letting her decide completely on her own, naked bottom method--all of them worked, but only for about 2 weeks. I've recently bought the book Toilet Training for Individuals with Autism or other Developmental Issues by Maria Wheeler. Has anyone attempted her method?