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Hi, hope someone replies, lifelong SPDer needs friends
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sleepysheepie Offline
Newbie

Posts: 1
Joined: May 2017
#1
Smile  Hi, hope someone replies, lifelong SPDer needs friends

I have reached middle age and never heard of SPD until recently. Grew up thinking I'm just defective in every way, born afraid of nearly everyone and everything on the planet. I suspect now that some of that was avoidance of overstimulation, maybe not true fear. Let it go undiagnosed and untreated for years however, and it becomes fear. As you might imagine, this makes for a very lonely, empty childhood. Adulthood too if no one knows what's wrong or how to help. You miss out on the fun stuff when you're always overstimulated and fearful. Risk taking behavior? Please. For me as a kid, that was trying strawberry instead of vanilla ice cream.Now it's turning the heating pad from low to medium to soothe the pain of muscle tension, sinus headaches and fibromyalgia. Wink

I've not been diagnosed (healthcare system has had little to nothing helpful to offer so I just stay away), but I know this is me. I found a book on SPD in the library awhile back that explained so much that I've suffered with ever since I can remember. I'll try not to ramble on too much, but probably will anyway.

I have extreme vestibular defensiveness with some modulation issues. This is the missing puzzle piece, the reason why I'm terrified by high speed, heights, being upside down, or any sensation of the ground not being still and solid underfoot. Strangely enough, though I couldn't tolerate any other playground equipment, I always loved the swings. As long as I was propelling it with my legs and controlling it. Couldn't stand being pushed, didn't trust having someone push from behind.

I also have mild to moderate defensiveness and lack of coordination in some of the other senses based on the checklist. Thank heaven I'm not the only one creeped out by chewing sounds or the dog licking himself. Hate noisy crowds of any kind. Too much ambient noise, even small things like multiple humming office machines and conversations around me at work, make it hard to think. This seems to be getting worse with age. I did well in school and showed giftedness in language skills, music and art, but received no more guidance there than in coping with multiple fears or developing social skills.

Bright light, weather changes, drama, and some foods can bring on migraines. Tinnitus is my copilot. Hot humid weather literally makes me sick, and I live in texas.:p I've wanted to move to the mountains since I was 8 years old, but don't know how to make that happen given all my challenges. Gotta keep trusting the Lord on that one, as in everything else. Trust that if it's his will, he will show me the way. And if it isn't, that he will enable me to bloom where he has planted me.

Life is a neverending battle to turn down the volume on all the input. And yes, I fully realize I'm blessed to be able to work full time, as not everyone is. It's just discouraging to come home from work every day drained. Most evenings, weekends and holidays are spent on bed rest to regain my strength and face the next work week. No human family to turn to for support, but I have been consistently owned and loved by some of the awesomest dog kids ever. I'd like to volunteer working with therapy or service dogs in some way if I can push back some of the chronic pain and fatigue. Heck of a way to live. Trying to keep a positive attitude in spite of it all.

Hope I haven't bored anyone too much. This seems to be a good safe place to deal with issues. Are there any Christians here? Dog lovers? I've joked for years that prayer and puppies have given me the strength to cope, but you know what, it's more true than it is a joke. Thanks for providing this forum.
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Shmueley Offline
Newbie

Posts: 1
Joined: Apr 2017
#2
RE: Hi, hope someone replies, lifelong SPDer needs friends

Hi there, I have SPD too did not get diagnosed until about 2 years ago. I remember being a kid and back then I just was "clumsy" or "oversensitive." It is amazing how many adults like us dealt with this for so many years and found ways to manage it without any help from anyone else. But like you said, it's exhausting and can be isolating. I'm glad you can find strength through your faith... I am a practicing Catholic Christian as well

Dont know if you have been to OT yet but it can be really helpful even if you're an adult. Also have you tried anything weighted like a weighted blanket at home or a weighted lap pad at work?
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kim1pettek Offline
Newbie

Posts: 1
Joined: Aug 2017
#3
RE: Hi, hope someone replies, lifelong SPDer needs friends

Hello! I am an Ot and have SPD...so interesting to see that your (Sleepsheepy) SPD is getting worse with age, so is mine!!!
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KathyR Offline
Newbie

Posts: 3
Joined: Jul 2017
#4
RE: Hi, hope someone replies, lifelong SPDer needs friends

Hi .I have just realised that I have had SPD all my life. In many ways it is better than it was as a child, as i have learnt coping skills. i am incredibly clumsy and after reading 'Too Loud, Too Bright, Too fast, Too Tight' by Sharon Heller, have found some improvement by trying out some of her ideas. In particular strong physical activity. I live in an old house ( near the mountains) and do my washing in a big bucket, outside. This involves carrying buckets of water, which seems to helps keep me connected better to my body. I drop a lot of things in the kitchen and used to get angry with myself; and now take a deep breath, tell myself it is SPD and do my best to focus. I am lucky that I live in a quiet place and do not need to deal with other people much. I love dogs, cats and feed the birds where I live.
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ChristianZ Offline
Newbie

Posts: 4
Joined: Sep 2017
#5
RE: Hi, hope someone replies, lifelong SPDer needs friends

Hi, sleepysheepie, Shmueley, kim1pettek, and KathyR. I can relate to a lot of what you are all saying. And I am a Christian as well.
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