I don't understand the scoring either. I asked the OT point blank, "What is her diagnosis that you're reporting to the insurance company?" She gave me a copy of the insurance report, which stated dyspraxia. Then after I had time to read the report and process it, I asked her to explain at the next visit how she arrived at dyspraxia, which she wrote clearly for me on a slip of paper.
It's great that you are figuring out his triggers. The one thing that always works with our daughter when we need her to do something she usually has a fit about is heavy work. She used to have a fit about getting her hair and teeth brushed. If we do something involving movement or lifting before bed time routine, it usually goes off without a hitch. Sometimes I'm amazed at how great she is with getting her hair and teeth brushed when I think about how it was a year ago.
If you're into reading, I'd recommend Growing an In-Sync Child. It has a lot of practical things that will address sensory issues and help your child adapt to his sensory problems. Glad you joined us!