Hey Maggie,
It is normal to feel frightened and sad. As parents we always want the best for our children and hurts us like hell to see them struggle.

The crashing your son does is common. My little guy does it all the time...it helps him "feel". I notice my little man does a lot less crashing and jumping on the furniture when he's burned off that excess energy and exercised his large muscle groups. When he is bouncing off the walls I will take him outside to ride his scooter, play soccer, or take a walk around the lake to count frogs. Indoors during the winter I will take him down in the basement and play hockey with him, let him bounce on his bouncy ball, or ride his scooter.

After all the research on my son, its come to my attention that I am a dead ringer for SPD. I completely understand the crashing thing. Often my joints and muscles get tense and need to be "stretched" firmly. If I don't stretch them...I get antsy...it can be maddening at times A way to pacify my jumpy muscles and joints is by vigorous exercise or deep tissue stretching sessions. I really like the foam rollers. They look like a really thick swimming pool noodle...but only a few feet long. You can go on youtube and learn stretching exercises. In fact, when my little guy sees me using it...he too will use it.

Whey he starts getting crashy or jumpy...I know its time to get him out of the current environment to a more physical one. It has been a LOT of trial and error. What works for my little guy may not necisarily work for your little guy. Ask your OT for advice and examples of difusing the situation. He or she should be able to give you a list of ideas as long as your arm.

BTW...the sleep thing sucks. My little guys has been sleeping with us since he was able to get out of his bed at night...not to mention he is a really light sleeper. He will sit up if you get up in the middle of the night to use the restroom...Beleive you me....I've tried to sneak away in the middle of the night in hopes of getting a few hours of undisturbed sleep. In fact, my little guy always has either his hand or foot on one you while he sleeps...kinda like his sleep alarm. We are in the midst of working on the sleep thing...if we come across any ground breaking info I will post.
Good Luck,
Frubsdad

(02-01-2013, 02:20 PM)Maggie in VA Wrote: Hi, all, thanks for all your help on the hair-pulling issue, and I'll be posting more on that. This afternoon, I am meeting with the OT that Bobby has been working with for about 9 months now. One question I have is, she asked me to read "The Out of Sync Child," and she has made various suggestions to my husband and me that seem to reflect SPD strategies, but she has never said outright that she believes Bobby has SPD.

So, I asked her in an e-mail, and we will discuss today, is there value to a label? Would getting a formal SPD diagnosis require a more extensive evaluation? What I'm gathering in a cursory search is that school systems resist granting IEPs based on SPD, so would that make a difference?

I admit, I'm really kind of frightened and sad now. When I went to the site for instructions on making weighted blankets, the site owner's latest blog post describes her son slamming into her, and Bobby has been doing that to me, I just didn't make that connection. (She talks about her 6yo doing that weighing 45 lbs. Well, Bobby is 38 lbs at almost 3; I hope to heaven a lady I spoke to last week who told me the weight gain slows down now and they grow upward is right.) Last night, Bobby had me up all night wanting me to sleep with him, although he did seem to improve a bit on the hair-pulling when I told him that Huggy Bear was his friend and it didn't hurt him to pull his hair.

Are there questions you can suggest I ask? I work, so it's hard to sit down with the OT. She usually comes to his day care first thing -- just getting the twins out of the door on time for the appointment is a strain -- and sometimes we can chat before I have to leave.

Thanks for all your advice,

Maggie