Ever thought it could be something else?
After discussing, with a counselor friend of mine, my extreme fear of sex--also a few other things, like extreme anxiety when my knees/legs are touched with hands (just hands), or hands are simply almost touching them, it was questioned whether or not I have repressed memories of a sexual trauma as a child. So I found this checklist and realized I have so many!! But almost all of them can also be explained by SPD. Another friend of mine who has experienced sexual abuse and has sensory issues says she has many of the following symptoms as well, some of them she had before the abuse, however. Anyhow, I wanted to see if anyone else felt they fit a lot of the symptoms on this list yet know for a fact they were NOT abused. I have very limited memories from before middle school so I'm unable to remember a life without SPD if I didn't have one....so here's the list:
Major indicators of childhood sexual abuse:
(present in adults and children)
Physical
Severe gag-reflex, even with nothing in or near mouth
Frequent or chronic severe nausea
Breathing and heart problems
Sleeping disorders (insomnia, hypersomnia, night terrors, constant nightmares)
Extreme startle-response (when touched, upon sudden loud noise, when someone enters room, etc.)
Chronic, unexplained pelvic pain
Chronic, unexplained gastro-intestinal problems
Chronic, unexplained headaches, backaches, and skeletal pain
Chronic, unexplained respiratory problems
In women: pseudocyesis (false pregnancy)
Addiction
Reluctance to follow good healthcare practices
Psychological
Dissociation (unresponsiveness, detachment, confusion, staring blankly, unexplained crying, feeling of separation from reality, feeling of "floating," out-of-body experience, feeling that everyone but self is experiencing reality, or vice versa)
Feeling of choking or suffocating
Unexplained fear of water touching face (pool, shower, etc.)
Feeling dirty, disgusting, and/or damaged
Unexplained feelings of shame
Fear of extreme loss of control; extreme need to feel in control
Feelings of extreme vulnerability
Constant anticipation of pain
Suicidal ideation
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or related symptoms: e.g., cycling back and forth from denial and repression to re-experiencing of traumatic event/s
Anticipation of early death
Panic disorder, panic attacks, and/or unmanageable anxiety
Extreme sensitivity and/or irritability
Difficulty regulating/processing emotions (emotional outbursts, disproportionate displays of anger, etc.)
Lack of confidence
Feelings of worthlessness and/or lack of self-respect
Intense fear of being wrong
Cognitive
Difficulty understanding what people mean
Difficulty answering simple questions (fear of misunderstanding and being tortured for "wrong answer")
Horrifying flashbacks (may be hazy or nonspecific)
Difficulty concentrating and/or learning
Behavioral
Self-injuring or self-mutilating behaviors (cutting, poking with pins, etc.)
Disordered eating (may or may not be related to body image disorders)
Suicidal gestures or attempts
Extreme responsibility and safety-consciousness, or extreme tendency to take risks
Criminal activity
Wearing excessively loose-fitting clothing, or more layers of clothing than weather requires
Social/Relational
Unreasonable fear of abandonment
Extreme need to please others, or refusal to "connect" with others at all
Intense fear of intimacy, or constant quest for intimacy
Social withdrawal or difficulty relating to others
Seeks out or stays in abusive relationships, or avoids relationships altogether
History of ambivalent feelings toward relational partners
Little confidence, or else total trust, in others (unreasonable in both instances)
Fear of loss of control in relationships; intense need to be in control
Difficulty expressing feelings and/or intense desire to self-disclose
Problems with social boundaries
Excessive feelings of gratitude for kind but small gestures from others
Too much eye-contact, or complete avoidance of eye-contact
In parents: repulsed by caring for baby in certain ways (nursing, taking temperature rectally, uncomfortable with child's nudity)
Sexual
Heightened sexual interest, or no interest at all
Promiscuity and/or prostitution
Recklessness
Compulsions
Sexual dysfunction
Unexplained pain
Flashbacks of abuse
Fantasies of raping or abusing others
Fantasies of being raped, tortured, tied, etc.
Exhibitionist-tendencies, or extreme fear of being seen nude
In medical situations
(Beyond typical person's fears of pain, needles, etc.)
Fear of medical and dental examinations, in general
Fear of having to lie down on exam-table or in dentist's chair
Extreme fear of being nude
Spontaneous tears when touched (silent crying, no sobs)
Irregular breathing during exam or treatment
Fear of aggression from doctors, nurses, medical professionals
Fear of or inability to tolerate having objects put in mouth (dentist's hands, tools, rubber dams, impression trays, x-ray bitewings, etc.)
Fear of dentist's hand over mouth or nose
Fear of suffocating
Fear of being unable to swallow
Unusually elevated levels of epinephrine and norepinephrine, which can interfere with effectiveness of certain anesthetics
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