Hi everyone,

I'm brand new here, and am just desperate for some help and support, even to just not feel alone!

My 6 year old son was diagnosed with SPD late last year. He did the SIPT earlier this year which identified modulation as his main problem area.

His current teacher does not seem to understand - or want to understand what SPD is, and has implied that she thinks something else is causing his poor concentration. I did tell her the educational psychologist we saw last year ruled out ADD, but I'm not sure it sank in.

At the moment our main issues are:
poor concentration
deteriorating behaviour as the week progresses - the teacher basically said from thursday, his school day is a write-off as he's not able to do anything.


This has been incredibly hard for me. First to accept that this is not just a minor little "thing" that I don't need to worry about, and then to watch my bright boy struggle in the classroom.

And this is where my other difficulty lies. He is always doing "fine" academically - the teachers can't fault him on his actual knowledge/school related skills, it seems that it's just that he doesn't focus in class, and this is a huge concern.
On the one hand, I realise that he needs to pay attention and carry out instructions.
On the other hand, having been told that he behaves perfectly on Mondays, which is when the teacher says she covers all new material for the week (Tues-Fri is spent revising, consolodating what they learnt on Monday), then I'm not sure why it's such a huge issue if he's not focussing so well on Thursdays? Especially as he's ahead both in reading, writing and maths/numeracy.

And herein lies my other question: does anyone have any experience with other SPD kids' behaving worse and worse as the week progresses? I'm not sure what to make of this? Is it related to being calm after a physically active weekend? Is it tied in to them only doing new work on Mondays - ie, is it maybe not SPD affecting him later in the week, but boredom after doing 2 or 3 days of revision?

He was in an awesome creche from 2-4 years old, and could reliably identify 3 letters at 2.5years old. He could count to 20 by 3, and was working out sums (17 + 3 = 20) just after he turned 4. In South Africa, where we live, the school curriculum only covers these things from Grade R / Kindergarten year. While I think there's enough other new material (life skills, general sciences, etc) to keep him interested, I am concerned that the constant revision of concepts he knew years ago could be boring him?
I only think he gained an advantage through a great foundation here - while he's "bright", he's not reciting poetry, playing the violin like Paganini or doing square roots

I think I better stop here. I have SO many questions but will try search through other posts before asking.

But if anyone has any ideas or advice about any of the above, please let me know?

Many thanks!

The first few thoughts that came to my mind are...
1. He is bored with revisiting the information
2. Lack of stimulation due to this
I will give you my thoughts as to why... My friend has a son who has autism ( am not saying your son does but the SPD is a common factor) he is in regular gen ed classes. He stays for the instruction and leaves to go do his work in another room. He cannot understand why there is the need for all the other "nonsense" he is very literal and straight forward thinker. You do what you are supposed to and get it done that is it. My son is very literal too. he is 8 with SPD. He sometimes can't understand why there is silliness as well.
Or by Thursday he is too overwhelmed and he is shutting down. If he does not have any pullouts during the day like for OT, Speech, Social worker or for her to even allow him to walk a note down to the office even if it doesn't say anything . He might need something ot light a fire under him. If she is not understanding then you should seek to have him placed in a another class with a teacher that does understand his needs. Or you can get him a sit fit cushion that will give hi constant motion to keep him alert. Tell her you want to sit on the class on Monday and observe then also on Thursday. Then you can see the difference as to what is going on and to his behaviors. If she is not going to try and solve the problem then you do it and take notes get all the ammo you can so the school has to listen. The weekend does help with getting out all that energy which makes it easier for them to focus on a task. He could be shutting down by the end of the week because he has just had it! My son is a sensory seeker and very impulsive so he has huge impulse issues when he get frustrated he acts out. He too is highly intelligent and I believe gets bored as well. He gets pulled out during the day, he eats lunch in a separate room because of all the noise in the cafeteria, so he has tools to help him cope. This teacher needs to work with you to make his day successful. I would go and observe, or try on Thursday before you go to school to have him to an energetic activity like running or playing some physical activity to see if that makes a difference in his day. I hope this made sense I feel like I was going in circles lol.

Thanks heather!

That's basically my thinking here too... but everyone seems to get touchy the moment I try ask if it's at all possible that he's bored. The school has an attitude of if a child says they're bored, he likely doesn't understand the material and needs to do more of the same - they put this in a supposedly tongue in cheek newsletter at the beginning of the year under 'what teachers wish they could tell you'.

The OT did observe him on a monday recently - she said he behaves perfectly, listens, concentrates etc. She said she'll observe again on a Thursday next term to try find out what happens later in the week that makes him fall apart concentration-wise.

My other problem is that he seems to be underperforming at school. He got barely-adequate grades for stuff like knowing his birthday month and home address - things they had to learn last year and that he was given a good mark for at the end of the year. He also got the second lowest possible mark for knowing numbers up to 6 when he came home the other day and said 'mommy, you know what? (What?) '1,3,5,7,9,11, ummmm, 13..."
I just don't understand - and with homework he will go through 20 sums and the only mistake he made was to add one number instead of subtract because his sister was screaming and he got distracted...
It just doesn't compute.
I do know he becomes extremely unco-operative when he's heading for a meltdown and will say I don't know to everything, but surely the teacher must watch them over the course of the term and not just ask something one random day?

We are planning to up his omegas again and try ADDvance concentration drops, he does do gymnastics on thursday evenings, we thought it would help, but aren't sure yet if it does.
I do think we need to try add some heavy work to thurs mornings though, thanks!

I'm just so tired of everything being so hard.

How fast does he learn? How much better does he do when he's challenged? Does he need the repetition or does he learn it the first time through?

Are his modulation issues mostly hypersensitivities? Hyposensitivities? Seeking? What's the school environment compared to the home environment? When you change the environment how much does his performance change?

It sounds to me like there's a combination of boredom and sensory issues going on here. How extreme the boredom is determines how you want to approach that side of it, but you do probably want to take that into account to. If you can give us more details, then can try to help propose ways to help him.

Along with all the questions I asked above, also, what senses are his issues in most (and in what types of modulation)?

Hi Tuttleturtle,

It depends on a lot of stuff... if he is even a little hungry/thirsty/tired/overloaded sensory wise - if his sisters are crying or if he was busy with something when I called him to come do homework, then everything takes forever (feels like it literally), it's like nothing gets through. He sometimes even starts to ask the same exact question over and over, especially if he doesn't like the answer. It's just a nightmare!

But on the rare, few occasions that he's not any of the above, he just GETS stuff so quickly and does really well - this is especially the case one-on-one and mostly the case at home.

He does seem to be more an audio learner(as opposed to visual who learn in chunks all at once), so he does well with repitition when it's stuff like flash cards / memorisation. He was selected to do Public Speaking at the start of the year and managed to memorise a 300+ word speech, and deliver it perfectly (by that I mean he didn't lose his place, forget anything or say "um" even once). The only sign he was nervous was that he didn't do even half of his gestures or the expressions we practiced. He came 4th at the competition, only 2% behind the 3rd place winner (sorry but I am very proud of him!)

His modulation seems to be tied with audio, visual and tactile input for the most part. The OT said he basically has floodgates open full time and has NO ability to filter any of this information.
The counting in 2s from 1 thing - 1,3,5,7 etc? He learnt this by looking at their class lockers every morning which are stacked 2 high and numbered from top to bottom, so 1,3,5,7,9 etc along the top and 2,4,6,8 across the bottom. (Who says SPD is all bad, right! (I am kidding, I think there are a lot of good things that can come from SPD if it's managed correctly!)
Unexpected touch, especially from people he doesn't know well and doesn't see often, is also an issue that can make him lash out and upset him a LOT - he has got better with this though and the teacher remarked that he is a caring boy who has great respect for his peers. It is still an issue at home but the problem is more with my 2-almost-3 year old middle daughter who just LOVES to irritate him!!!

His two strongest systems are vestibular and proprioceptive, and according to the OT, he's trying to use those to help with the weak ones but he's not doing it effectively or appropriately. Like he always wants a belt on, and has it super-tight (to the point where I worry about stomach aches). His shoes have to be very tight as well (we have regular meltdowns around not managing to tie his laces in the EXACT way he feels is right - which is quite complicated - and while he manages to tie them, it's often not as tight as he likes and I have to redo them, but only ever in the way he prefers!). Velcro(Aplix?) shoes are usually so tight half the top velcro strip hangs off the side of his shoes. He often asks me to push down on his shoulders when we're out at a mall / in a big busy place full of people.

ummm... the OT did tell me the thresholds for his various senses. I think for visual and audio she said he can take a lot before he's overloaded, but then will have a major meltdown, where with touch it doesn't take much for him to feel overwhelmed.

Problem wise: As far as I know, he just doesn't concentrate. Last year the teacher said his attention span was very poor, and this year the teacher says it's more an issue that he doesn't concentrate on anything at all later on in the week. Apart from this I can't say there seems to be any/many issues at all. There were a few incidents of bad behaviour (fooling around when the teacher was talking, not listening, fighting with kids in line) and he was put into break-time detention (ISS?), but that was early in the term and hasn't been repeated - as far as I know anyway.

As an aside: Does anyone have any experience with Integrated Learning Therapy (or the HANDS programme), or Integrated Listening Therapy? We're considering trying this...

Also, should I be concerned if the OT has not shared the goals and plan for reaching them with us? The schools break up today here for Easter holidays, but I asked her about this on Monday and she hasn't replied at all. I'm not sure if it's normal for there to be a BIG break between tests and a therapy plan or if we should have heard something by now?

School vs home...
He's in a class of about 30 kids, and the teacher seems quite strict. He goes to OT during school time every Monday. They have physical education as part of the syllabus and do music as well. There are also a variety of extramurals he can do - we just stuck to Public speaking last term as he's already doing gymnastics outside of school.
The teacher just moved him to a desk at the back of the room where he sits alone (no constant input from a desk-buddy), and he's against the wall so he only has to focus on stuff coming from the front and left side. The teacher thinks he's doing better there... we'll see.

Home - is hectic as we have 3 kids, our 6 year old is the eldest, we have a little girl turning 3 in April, and another little girl who just turned 1 in February. At the moment a lot of my time is spent on our eldest doing homework and OT activities and just trying to keep everything calm and running ok. My (3) year old screams blue murder straight off when she's upset - so she is VERY loud (we suspect there are a number of sensory issues going on for her as well... but that's another story), and the 1 year old still needs a lot of mommy-time. My husband is very involved but hated school and doesn't really understand all the fuss / what the problem is as our son is still 'doing fine' even with all the SPD challenges and while he agrees our son seems to be underperforming at school, he doesn't seem to think this is anything to worry about either.

Do I worry too much???

Well I think I've written way too much and need to stop. Thanks for the input so far I can't say how glad I am to have found this forum!!!

Last night I helped to host a support group for parents and one of the things the OT said was .... about the vestibular system, if it is off then a part of that tis not paying attention in school. So they have kids sit on yoga balls as their chairs. I have seen these in catalogs. That bouncing gets their vestibular system going which in turn gets their learning going! Remember you said though the teacher doesn't cooperate, so he could have had a meltdown or maybe he is trying to hold himself together and just shutting down completely. When I do homework with my son he gets like 10 min on 10 min off, If it is something he is going to struggle with there has to be breaks. I live with timers set. they need that start and end point. Keep him in gymnastics my son loved it when it. I need to get him back in it. He liked it when it was at a place with just one class, I had him at a place prior to that where there were several classes at one time and he would just have meltdowns. Swimming is his absolute favorite, bowling is good (heavy work with the ball). Find what he likes and work from that. When he gets home from school do you allow time for a snack break before starting with school work? My son runs in grabs his snack the shirt, shoes, socks fly off and he sits down and turns on a cartoon for 30 min. He knows that is his break time before getting his homework done. Suggest to the OT about the yoga ball to sit on and see what she thinks. The OT last night said they have 15 kids sitting on yoga balls in my son's school district. Good luck let us know how the Thursday with the OT watching goes!!! Heather

Thanks Heather,

I really like that idea about break time. Often when we get home dinner is about 20-30mins off, so I don't like to give a snack when after another 20 minutes I'm going to need him to eat "real" food, you know?
Recently I've tried to switch it around and rather rush getting supper done, let him eat (they get to watch cartoons while I'm cooking, and quite often while eating - yes I know this isn't great but at this stage of my life I need 5 minutes of relative sanity!!) - and only after supper then get started on homework. My only trouble doing things this way around is that he really needs quite a lot of sleep to function well, and if supper takes a little longer than an hour, then it's getting on for bedtime by the time we start homework.

I googled the sit fit cushion and I think the teacher is more likely to allow something like that than the yoga balls as it's less disruptive to other kids.

I love the bowling idea (never thought of it as heavy work!!) and we do usually swim once a week at my in-laws house.

I might need to start doing 10min on/off. Everything seems to take him such a long time!

Question re gymnastics - did it completely exhaust your son when he was in it? Our son comes back, and basically just manages to eat before crashing for the night. I've completely written off Thursday evenings with regards to doing homework as it's just impossible. Something that would take 5mins on a good day can take 30mins or more (though I usually stop at that point unless there's something that absolutely HAS to be handed in the next day).
And - also, was your son absolutely hyper in gymnastics? Our son is busy, but not often hyper - the first session at gymnastics though, he was bouncing off the walls all over the place with excitement. I think it was just because he loved it so much, but I'd never seen him like that!

The OT has said that while she can make suggestions to the teacher, there's nothing forcing the teacher to use her suggestions. I really envy you your 504s and IEPs. South Africa has an "Inclusive education" policy, but what this *actually* means, no-one seems to know.

My son is always hyper!!!! lol Before therapy when he was younger he would jump across concrete on his knees!!!! Scared me to death! He used to just RUN all over!!!!! He loved gymnastics he would get excited and hand flap a bit, but he was doing good with being patient. His skills were not so good because of his vestibular. He is very clumsy and with being impatient he did not take the time to actually pay attention. that was fine because he just needed to do it. I am sure your son was just so excited that he could not contain himself! lol That is a good thing!!!

Hey, don't feel guilty about watching tv and eating, I do it!!!! You also have to regain your sanity in order to be at your top level. Let him sit and relax for what ever amount of time you think, use a timer and when it goes off he goes to do his homework while you are still making dinner. If he needs help he can call for you. Maybe try the yoga ball or sit fit cushion for at home while doing homework as well. He might need that input to keep his mind moving to get his work done. You can make him a little cubby to do his homework at with two folders taped together and set it up so he is not distracted by anything else going on around him.

Don't be too jealous of the 504 and IEP! lol You still have to fight like hell!!! My son's school is an all inclusive because the director of special ed does not believe in having kids sit one room all room all day with other children that have similar issues. They need the socialization with other children that do function at a normal level, just the difference is the teachers will cooperate with the OT anyone else that is on your child's team. I wonder if you could convince the teacher to put his homework together in a weekly packet that is handed in at the end of the week. My sons teacher does that, it's a whole class thing, but there is not that demand of having it in the next day. So then we do two pages a night, sometimes there is extra something, but it is not so overwhelming. He knows the routine, two pages a day ( sometimes I can talk him into finishing it up so he has the rest of the week with no homework). Then you know how to plan your afterschool/evening. It just makes me so mad when teachers do not cooperate and try to make adjustments for the child so they can be successful.

Thanks Heather, lots of good ideas here! :-)

I'll try see what the teacher will agree to - I STILL haven't heard back from the OT

Thanks so much for all the advice! :-)